


Timestamp: Spectrum

by steelneena



Series: All That's Ahead and Behind [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Caleb and Molly are very in love., Emotional Intimacy, Emotional Sex, First Time, Hand Jobs, High levels of emotional intimacy, M/M, Soft sex, True Love, sex by moonlight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 10:53:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16283246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steelneena/pseuds/steelneena
Summary: Set several months after the epilogue of "All That's Ahead and Behind"





	Timestamp: Spectrum

**Author's Note:**

> I'm very nervous about posting this. I haven't written any sort of sex scene in over a year, and I never wrote very much of it to begin with, and all I had done previously was M/W. I've read a lot of M/M but that means nothing. I hope this is good, I hope you like it and I hope it satisfies. 
> 
> I highly suggest completing All That's Ahead and Behind if you want to understand certain moments, or if you don't want to be spoiled. If you don't mind being a bit confused, and don't care about spoilers, feel free to read on for some sexytimes. 
> 
> "Zemnian Translations in end notes"

Soft, silvery moonlight spilled in through the open window, the gauzy drapes fluttering in the breeze. They sat, limbs tangled together, drenched in the grey light of night, the bedclothes laying over the chaise at the end of the bed, only the sheet rumpled beneath them. The Nicodranas night was warm, comforting in the light of all the uncertainty they’d once faced.

It was still new, the intimacy between them, and almost overwhelming. The stinging drag of fingernails across Caleb’s shoulders contrasted with the gentle brush of finger pads, a tantalizing trail down, down to the slight dip of dimples at his lower back, where they pressed inwards, kneading flesh gently but firmly. Simultaneously, sharp teeth grazed his neck, the sensation sending an electric shiver down his spine, pulsing in his abdomen and sending shocks lower.

Reflexively, Caleb arched into Mollymauk, scrabbling for purchase against his lover’s flesh, hands grasping at arms and back, shoulders, neck, finding their way into his hair where his fingers tangled. As Molly bit down gently on his pulse, lips chasing the nips soothingly down his throat, Caleb’s grip loosened. Their bodies bare and flush, each movement sent Caleb spiraling a bit further below the surface.

“Molly…” He keened desperately. Against the tender skin of his collarbone, Caleb felt Molly’s impish smile as he pressed Caleb gently back into the mattress, hands sliding down his sides, falling to rest on the slight curve of his hips as Molly straddled Caleb’s thighs. His eyelids fluttered as Molly bent down over him and he felt Molly press close to him once more, the barest hint of friction jolting him completely. Molly’s lips touched his in a ghosting brush before they fell upon his eyes, one after the other, softly, tenderly, ending the path of passionate devotion.

“Tell me, Caleb, my dear heart.” Molly’s voice the shadow of a caress. “Tell me.”

“I-Ich möchte…ich will dich, ich will, ich will-“

Lips against his ear, breath hot. “I love you.”

The roiling pressure building in Caleb’s belly heightened and his breath caught. Molly hadn’t moved, hovering over him, hands gripping his sides in the same place, waiting.

“I-love you-too,” His words puffed out from his lips, almost forced from the overwhelming space between touch and absence, between pressure and weightlessness.

There was a shift. Molly moved back, grasped one of Caleb’s hands from where it lay in the sheets, pressing it into the softness of his stomach, the roughness of Caleb’s calloused fingers unimpeded by the silken skin as Molly slid his hand up until it covered the co-mingled scars above his heart, the raised, mottling of tree branches left behind after deaths that he could no longer remember. The mark fit to Caleb’s palm like it belonged there, the steady rhythm of Molly’s thrumming heart beneath the silvery skin bleeding into his own pulse until they were synchronized.

“Take it Caleb. Can you feel it? Can you feel that my heart is yours?”

Caleb’s breath stuttered, the wash of emotion falling over him anew; each time Molly said such things, Caleb felt like he was drowning in light, a fire that burned, but did not destroy, instead nourishing him, feeding the feelings within him until he felt like he was going to burst open, cool flames licking out of him, leaving behind blossoms of lavender light.

Hot, wet tears rolled out of the corners of his eyes and he grasped at his lover mindlessly, eyes shutting tight against the onslaught. Like lightning, it surged through him, the desire, the passionate ache, as though he needed something to fill some unknown emptiness within him, within his heart.

“Du bist meine Seele. Du hast mich, immer, immer, Molly, Molly! Erfüll mich, bitte, _bitte_ . Erfüll dich meine Seele. Lass mich nicht rein. Lass mich nicht rein. _Brenne mich._ ”

Molly chuckled, so low and deep that the sound was almost salacious, but the intensity of his voice belayed a seriously that the laugh did not. “You’ll have to tell me what all that means later, my darling.” He still held Caleb’s hand in place with his own, but the moment that Caleb’s eyes opened and he saw Molly above him, looking down, eyes lidded heavily with desire, Molly moved. His hips rolled over Caleb’s teasingly. Caleb who was wrecked, completely, nerve endings wired, emotionally taxed from the intensity of the experience.  

He was burning thoroughly then; each touch of Molly’s skin to his own set Caleb’s body and heart aflame as Molly began to rock against him languidly and how could he be so unhurried when Caleb was feeling so much?

Pitifully, he whined, reaching out with his free hand, grasping nothing but air in the process. The hand that lay at his waist flew up, Molly catching Caleb’s wrist, lightly encircling it as he pushed Caleb’s arm to his side on the mattress, leaning heavily on the point of contact while managing to keep the pressure off of Caleb himself. With his other hand, Molly let go, leaving Caleb fingers to brush lightly against the scar as they trailed down Molly’s torso without the support he’d provided to keep them there.

Caleb almost didn’t notice it when Molly grasped him; the slide of fingertips like whispers over his length left him moaning as they came and went.

“Are you with me, Caleb?”

“Ja, I am with you, mein Engel,” Caleb’s chest rose and fell harshly but Molly pressed down lightly on his chest in mirror of their earlier position.

“I can feel your heart, dear one.” Molly, it seemed, was also beginning to lose his composure, breaths coming much faster than before, voice catching as he spoke. “It’s beating in time with mine. It’s yours, Caleb, yours, yours, yours,”

The string of Caleb’s control, drawn so taut, snapped and he surged upwards, pulling Molly to him, hips thrusting of their own accord, searching for friction. Satisfyingly, Molly gasped at the alteration, his hand snaking between them in response to grasp once more, bringing them together. His hand slid smoothly, slick from their mutual arousal, as they clung to one another, so close together that they were sharing their very breath; for every exhale Caleb pushed out, Molly was inhaling, a push and pull, give and take of equal measure as the pace quickened, all effort at languorous, decadent lovemaking lost to the heady intensity of their nearness. Their mouths were open in quick syncopated pants, lips brushing without kissing as they thrust together, pressing so close that Caleb felt they might finally melt into one another permanently.

It wasn’t enough.

Caleb clutched at Molly’s hand as it found its way to his hair before Caleb buried his face in the juncture of Molly’s sculpted shoulder and slender tattooed neck, nosing at the skin there for the scent of sweat and lilacs. One last swipe of Molly’s thumb over his head sent Caleb to the brink, vision whiting out as he held fast to his lover, desperate for purchase as his orgasm overwhelmed him. In the same breath, Molly followed him over, and they tumbled back, Caleb’s head resting over Molly’s heart.

Caleb took to whispering sweet nothings in Zemnian as his breathing evened out, as Molly’s fingers threaded through his hair. For a long while, he simply let his hands wander along the smooth planes of Molly’s chest beneath him; in the light, the lilac of his skin looked grey and Caleb was pushed back, back to a time when Molly’s form was a malleable swirling of colourless smoke in a monochromatic world. He wondered then, about the emptiness he felt even at their most intimate, wondering if it was anything akin to how Molly had felt without his soul, anguished and yearning for something, anything, to satiate such a need.

“Tell me what you’re thinking, dear heart.” Molly’s voice fell soft against the warm feathering of the wind as it buffeted the curtain, its undulating form visible from Caleb’s peripherals.

“I am glad you cannot recall the emptiness you felt. I am glad you will never have to know it.”

Molly hummed at him, the only response that seemed forthcoming, filling the space like a pause, indicative that Caleb would have to keep speaking if he wanted to hear something else in return, share the truth he found himself reluctant to reveal.

“I think sometimes I have felt something like that emptiness, Mollymauk.”

“Is that so, my love?”

“Ja.”

Molly shifted beneath him and his head hitting the pillow and suddenly Caleb was eye to eye with Molly, his dark stare unblinking as he reached forward, caressing Caleb’s cheek.

“Do you feel it now, Caleb?”

“Sometimes it is…na ja…sometimes it is as though I can never be close enough to you. It should feel right when you are near. Instead, it leaves me aching.”

The corner of Molly’s mouth quirked upwards contemplatively and Caleb found himself distracted by how much he wanted to press a kiss there, a secret, lingering kiss that wouldn’t ever leave, so that every time he were to look on that particular corner of Molly’s perfect mouth, he would see it there still, an imaginary parcel of his devotion permanently clinging in place where it had been left. A monument of his love.

With a hushed reverence, Caleb added “When you are nearest, I feel emptiest of all; I can reach out to touch you, but you are not a part of me. Not anymore.”

Molly cupped Caleb’s jaw, inclined his head closer still. “I was once, wasn’t I? I tied my very soul to you, once.”

“I am bereft of that nearness, mein Engel.”

The shadows of Molly’s lashes fell dark against his cheeks tantalizingly and Caleb reached out a finger to lightly brush the spot.

“Then let me nearest you. Let me help you feel that way again, dear heart, if only for a time.”

Caleb felt Molly’s hand brush down the inside of his thigh pushing gently to part his legs. He allowed the movement without resistance, tingles resultant from the touch chasing up his spine, sparking through his body, electric. For a several minutes, there was little but that same touch, repeated, soothing him but sending his heart racing in turn. Eventually lulled, Caleb let his eyes shut for a moment, allowing himself to submerse in the sensations, all trace of remaining tension from bitter memories drained away completely.

Molly’s fingers drifted higher, knuckles barely brushing his length as he did and then- Caleb stuttered a breath, eyes flying open. Without missing a beat, Molly was leaning over him again watching him carefully, cautiously. His darkly plum hair curtained the sides of his face, short, loose curls springing a bit at the movement enticingly. The comforting closeness sent Caleb lax again easily and Molly briefly reached away to a place he couldn’t see, rummaging somewhere in the side table.

“You’ll tell me, Caleb, if it’s too much?”

 _It can never be enough_ , Caleb thought, but only had it in him to nod by way of response, barely able to murmur a “ja” to satisfy Mollymauk’s sensibilities.   

He saw the glint of light off a glass bottle, understanding, and then it was gone as Molly propped himself up beside Caleb, looking down on him tenderly as one slender finger pressed against him; there was a degree of pressure, not quite force, but firm, even distribution, moving in slight circles. Caleb gasped at the sheer intimacy of it, unable to tear his eyes from Molly. Molly who was looking down on him as if in awe and Caleb couldn’t quite understand it, how it was Molly could be feeling awe in such a moment when he was not the one _feeling_ the touches, but initiating them. How Molly could find awe in looking at him, when it was Caleb who felt such for kind, sweet, playful Molly. It was only when he realized that they were both fully hard again that Molly began to speak, rambling almost.

“You’re beautiful, so beautiful. Gods! Caleb, you’re gorgeous like this. I want to kiss your every freckle and learn their constellations and put them in the sky so even when you’re not there with me I can see you, just like this, forever. I wish you could see yourself the way I do. I wish you could see what I see.” Molly’s voice lacked the composure Caleb had anticipated; he sounded just as far gone as Caleb felt, his voice catching, thick with emotion.

Suddenly, Caleb’s body gave and Molly’s finger breached him without resistance. It was different from anything else he’d experienced before. Between the new feeling and Molly capturing his lips simultaneously in a slow, sensual kiss, Caleb hardly had time to process it all. Steadying himself, Molly placed one hand on Caleb’s bicep, his grip there adding another layer to the wall of sensations.

It was almost as if someone had cast _slow_ on them. Caleb couldn’t look away from Molly; the adoration plain on his features struck Caleb hard and he felt irrationally close to tears again. He should only be so blessed, somehow, despite everything, that Molly would choose him, not once, but twice. While the thoughts distracted him, a second finger pressed in nearly comfortably beside the first. As he did, Molly ghosted half kisses on his lips, trying, it appeared, desperately to multitask and not quite succeeding. The desire for tears turned to laughter, but Caleb was so short of breath that it came out as a few stilted bursts of panting before the slight burning stretch dissipated into a contraction of overwhelming pleasure that left him seeing stars as Molly hit something inside him that he hadn’t known existed.

“-ove you, gods, oh gods,” Molly was mouthing the words against his skin, mingled with the most tender of kisses. In the fog of Caleb’s blissed-out brain he silently thanked the Archeart for his perfect memory, that he might reconsider all that was happening again later with better clarity, thanked the Wildmother for allowing Molly to return to him in the first place, thanked the Moonweaver for the blessing she’d placed on their love at Molly’s behest, ensuring that they would make the choices that lead them to that very moment. Molly hit the spot again and Caleb arched up beneath him, frantically.

“Molly! Göttern, bitte! Mollym-m-mauk, ich brauche dich in mir, ich will-“

The sudden loss of Molly’s fingers from within him left Caleb shuddering. Molly rolled to his back, his total absence a stark shock to Caleb’s system. He was shook out from within his head as the mattress shifted and Molly pulled, hands on Caleb’s hips, until he slid down, rucking the sheet in the process. Lifting Caleb’s legs out to the sides, Molly moved into the vee created in the space there, as close against Caleb as he was able. He made to balance his weight, letting one hand come to rest again at Caleb’s hip and leaned over, nuzzling at his nose to Caleb’s jaw.

“I am a part of you, Caleb. Forever. Truly. Memory or no, I’m yours. I’m with you. I love you. I chose you.”

The surety in Molly’s voice hit him like a bolt to the heart. Caleb’s eyes widened at the blunt press against were he was loosened and suddenly the emptiness he’d felt was banished physically as Molly thrust slowly inside of him as he was able, shaking from the effort of holding back, languid inch by inch, pausing incrementally as Caleb accommodated him. The fullness was incredible; it contrasted pleasantly with the slight burning stretch and for the first time in over a year, the aching place where he felt Molly missing from him was satiated utterly. Molly was a part of him in all ways and it was enough, it was enough. Molly was there with him, would not be taken away again. Never again.

Caleb put an open palm to Molly’s face. He couldn’t look away, couldn’t bear to break his gaze as his lover bottomed out within him, flush against one another, as close together as physically possible. It was utterly overwhelming and it made Caleb only want more. He wrapped his ankles around the backs of Molly’s thighs, pressing against him with his heels. With a slight nod of his head, Caleb waited in anticipation as Molly, taking it for what it was, rolled his hips before pulling back out, pistoning back in again quickly. The jolt was enough to send Caleb’s pulse skyrocketing. Again, but more slowly, the dragging friction of Molly inside of him made the muscles in Caleb’s abdomen tighten with delicious pleasure as the burn lessened and the sensation of fullness took over.

Desperately, Caleb clutched about Molly’s shoulders, their foreheads pressing together as Molly thrust into him. “Take me, Molly. Take me, _please_ . _Please.”_

Molly wasted no time, the pace of his thrusts picking up, growing erratic as Caleb lifted his own hips abortedly, trying to match the rhythm to no avail as Molly fell apart over him. Caleb lost what little control was left to him, between the continued, breathy ‘I love you’s and glancing, sloppy kisses and surging attempts to catch their breaths.

With one particularly sharp thrust, Caleb cried out, tightening his embrace as he came, whole body locking up from the wave of pure pleasure and overwhelming emotion. One, two thrusts later and he could feel the hot surge of Molly’s release within him as he collapsed a top him. When Caleb came back to himself enough that he could see blurry shapes in the night, he gazed down Molly’s form, still from exhaustion, more still than Caleb had ever witnessed. Not even his tail moved an inch, when it usually at least twitched at the end in catlike fashion.

“Molly…Engel…” he whispered, terrified that the crystalline purity of the moment would be spoilt if he spoke any more loudly.

Molly’s chest rose and fell in tandem with his own, their position in parallel to a very different moment of intimacy, but Caleb tried to push the memory of Molly’s third death from his mind easily as the Tiefling’s light breaths came hot and fast against his clavicle. A few moments passed before Molly raised himself up on his forearms, slipping soft from within Caleb and looking earnestly down at him.

“Alright, dear one?”

“Ja, liebling. Ja, Molly.”

“I-how…I- do you feel, um…?”

Caleb pushed back a lock of hair from Molly’s forehead, tucking it behind one curled horn. His hand lingered there, petting at the silk of Molly’s tresses. The dangling jewelry there caught the moonlight, sparking a shimmering glare across the room. Starry eyed, Caleb inclined his head from the mattress just enough to capture Molly’s lips, kissing him almost innocently.

“Ich liebe dich, Mollymauk.”

A soft look passed over Molly’s features and he leaned in, nuzzling their noses together before returning the tender kiss.

“I may not be able to give you my soul, but my heart is yours, always, Caleb.”

“It is safe, Engel. I promise, I promise.”

They stayed close like that for another moment, and then Molly lifted himself off of Caleb. The brief moment where they were not touching somehow didn’t feel as terrible as it had before as he watched Molly make himself comfortable, curling into Caleb’s side over his arm and put his own over the softness of Caleb’s stomach.

“I love you.” Molly’s voice was a whisper in the dark, his eyes a dark but welcoming void. Absently, Caleb curled his arm up, resting his thumb on Molly’s shoulder, rubbing rhythmically over the slightly raised scars that bisected his many glorious tattoos until sleep took them both, the night carrying them gently away.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Caleb called Molly Engel, which means Angel.  
> “I-Ich möchte…ich will dich, ich will, ich will-“ - "I would like....I want you, I want, I want-"  
> “Du bist meine Seele. Du hast mich, immer, immer, Molly, Molly! Erfüll mich, bitte, bitte. Erfüll dich meine Seele. Lass mich nicht rein. Lass mich nicht rein. Brenne mich.” - "You are my soul. You have me, always, always, Molly, Molly! Fulfill me, please, please. Fulfill my soul. Don't let me go, don't let me go. Burn me."  
> na ja - a space filler, like 'um'  
> liebling -my love  
> Ich liebe dich -I love you  
> Göttern, bitte! Mollym-m-mauk, ich brauche dich in mir, ich will- - Gods, please, [...] I need you in me, I want-


End file.
